1. Wolfie Rental App: Wolfie is Stony Brook’s resident celebrity. He has a busy schedule, running back and forth from event to event without rest, but the student body cannot get enough of him.
“Our nation was founded on sound Christian principles.” If I had a stick for every time I heard this phrase, I would have enough timber to build a thirty-foot burning effigy of Donald Sterling.
What gives, Kyle? Why did you do it? Why did you vote against making the Student Activity Fee mandatory? Are you just anti-fun? Or worse—a libertarian? Do you not enjoy being coerced?
The United States, despite having a military capable of destroying the Earth 35 times over, is notoriously behind the times on a number of social issues. One of these areas of concern is education. American public school students are simply not being challenged enough. To address this problem, education officials have drafted a number of reforms in the last decade or so – most notably, No Child Left Behind – with the aim of improving education in the country. While most of these reforms have good intentions, many would argue they have created a bureaucratic quagmire that makes an incentive of “teaching to the test.”
Music thumping, bodies sweating, people vomiting – this is a familiar scene to most college students. The drug-fueled party is a fixture in almost every American college. At these events, the real life of the party is alcohol, derived from Arabic al-kuhul, the definitive social lubricant, a drug as ancient as civilization itself.
Did you hear about the good Christian man who lost his faith? He was a respected and active member of his church community for decades. Then one day, a gay couple walked into his restaurant. He served them coffee. And just like that, in a flash, his faith abandoned him. His soul was extricated. In an instant, he had become a morose, atheist heathen. He got a nice big A tattooed on his left buttock. He started sacrificing goats to honor the memory of Christopher Hitchens. He even started writing snarky diatribes on Facebook.